I love you, super-fast Aldi checkout line

I know there are a lot of grocery stores out there and they each have their plus and minuses. Stater Bros. is cheap but doesn’t have much outside of the staples. Trader Joe’s has some cool items but the parking lot is super shitty. Clark’s has some nutritious things but they also have that dude always being a dick to that nice lady on television. As for Aldi, I dig their prices though, in my non-expert opinion, their products are just kinda ok – but I shop there anyway because their checkout is the best part of any grocery store.

You know what messes up any grocery store shopping experience? Someone dying in the produce department, that’s what. But, since that rarely happens, we move on to the second biggest bummer: having to wait forever in line just to pay for your stuff.

This doesn’t happen often at Aldi, because they don’t mess around with bagging your apples, milk, and seven frozen pizzas – they just throw it all in a cart and make you do it on a shelf a few feet away from the register. Yeah, I know this isn’t exactly full-service, but I don’t care.  Plus Aldi has done some things like making sure their barcodes are super easy to scan, ensuring that their checkers are the fastest.

I will literally do anything not to have to stand in line while someone on their phone watches an underpaid grocery store employee ring up all of their stuff, bag it, then try to get the attention of the customer who is so engrossed in their dumb phone conversation, they have forgotten that they have to actually pay for all of their wine, Raisin Bran, and Lean Cuisines.

Of course, it being my line, that person almost always pays by check or can’t figure out the credit card terminal – but this rarely happens at Aldi.  And do you know why?   Because the cell phone crowd doesn’t shop there because they are too entitled to rent a cart for a quarter and bag up their own stuff.  So, yeah, it’s a win-win!

Keep doing what you do, Aldi checkout line.  You’re the fastest and the best and I love you.

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