KMIR Proves Aliens Exist Because They Say So Damn It!

KMIR News | Palm Springs, California

TV sweeps month is winding down – which is too bad, because we will have to wait until November for more amazing segments like the “special report” on UFOS that aired last night on KMIR.

To recap the piece (video above): “The Coachella Valley is well known for unusual sightings in the night sky,” proclaims reporter Gitzel Puente (also music festivals, hot temperatures and meth btw).   As it would turn out, The Coachella Valley is “right next to an extraterrestrial hot spot” – which I believe was also the slogan of The Star Wars Cantina. This is where some new age music kicks in, followed by some blurry YouTube videos of lights in the sky (I guess?), and hey…it looks like someone in the editing room knows how to use Google Earth!  giant rock KMIRKMIR’s “travels” take them all the way (59 miles) to Giant Rock – which, and this will surprise you, is a giant rock in the middle of nowhere in the High Desert.  It is at Giant Rock where George Van Tassel once lived and spoke on his contact with Venus and flying saucers.  Yup, he had contact with aliens.  From Wikipedia:

Van Tassel said the occupant of a space ship from the planet Venus woke him up, invited him on board his space ship, and both verbally and telepathically gave him a technique for rejuvenating the human body. In 1954, Van Tassel and others began building what they called the “Integratron” to perform the rejuvenation.

So this guy sounds totally believable already, but for all of you who still may doubt – you need to hear from “Big Rock and UFO researcher (is that accredited?) Barbara Harris… ufo researcher Harris informs us that Giant Rock is “near” the 33rd parallel – which is the same parallel as The Bermuda Triangle and The Egyptian Pyramids….therefore aliens.  Got it!  And do you know what else is on the 33rd parallel? Of course you don’t – because no one other than UFO people and map makers give a shit about parallels.  But maybe you should, according to Harris, “on that parallel…it is documented that it is the most UFO sightings that happened.”  And there is nothing more scientific, than a UFO documented sighting. lights KMIR From there, more video of unexplained lights in the sky are shown (which is weird being next to a military base and all) and more people who have sighted UFOs are interviewed.  But then, things get really crazy as an actual scientist explains that the sightings were probably not UFOs and these people have no idea what they are talking about…nah, just kidding – KMIR did not put anyone qualified to talk on the tv…because aliens exist damn it!!! Well at least during sweeps month they do.