At what temperature is wearing shorts acceptable to wear to work in the desert?

Those who live in Palm Springs, Phoenix, and Hell know that summer (and half of spring and half of fall) bring disgustingly hot and gross temperatures. For some reason, some people in these communities (mostly in managerial roles) insist that everyone live their lives as if it’s still 72 degrees outside – even though it’s 120 and you want to die just thinking about going outside. Now sure, if you are lucky to have an office type job you can take advantage of your workplace’s air conditioner (assuming your boss isn’t a cheapass who turns it up to 82 when you’re not looking), but if you have to head out to a meeting, run an errand, or whatever, you are bound to be hot as hell, especially if you are one of the suckers who has a work dress code or feels pressured to wear some form of business attire (i.e. slacks) because of your job. So at what temperature, if there is one, should it be acceptable to wear shorts to work on a hot desert workday?

Yes, I know, some of the ladies in the workplace and can get away with wearing a skirt or a dress or whatever and that’s rad.  I suppose, I’m also a bit jealous of all of the Scottish kilt wearers living it up in the heat of the desert (if there are any), but for anyone who is forced to wear pants on a 112 degree day, wtf?

Also, I know there are plenty of people who work outside in crazy hot desert temps who, right now, are like, “eat shit and die, blogging asshole!” – and that’s deserved. 

As for everyone else, it’s time to figure out some sort of rule that allows for the wearing of short pants to work and business meetings that won’t get you the stink eye or fired.  And no, we are not taking about jorts, cargo, or basketball shorts here. People can still wear shorts and still look nice.

Right, LeBron?

Okay, maybe that’s a little too nice, but you get my point.

Naturally, the century mark comes to mind as the perfect temp for this as longtime residents might associate it with heat since back in the day you could call Power Radio in the Coachella Valley at the moment it hit 100 degrees to win waterpark tickets. But, there are other people who would insist that is not nearly hot enough as they still go out on hikes when it’s 100 because they’re “tough” and, obviously, not very smart.

Would 105 be an acceptable mark? Maybe. What about 110 degrees? Oh, I would be ok with that. 115? If it were up to me, short pants would be enforced at this point. And what about 120 degrees? Well, that’s when we should all just go home so we can draw the shades and eat ice cream, watch Netflix, and dream about what it will be like to be able to go outside again in November.

So what temperature, if any temperature, should it be okay to wear shorts to a professional-type job or business meeting in the Coachella Valley.  Let’s discuss in the comments and set a rule and live by it.

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  1. 85-95 degrees ‘ok.’ 95 and above definitely do it, BUT it has to be done properly. A button down collared long-sleeve shirt (ok roll the sleeves up for the resort style) works to dress it up. And, of course, the proper footwear, etc. One of my more recent retail “gigs” was with a ‘luxury casual wear’ brand so wearing shorts, or anything that was currently sold in the store made shorts a 365-day-a-year proposition. On the other hand I’ve had other gigs that required black pants, white shirts, etc., etc. no matter what and managers who would look the other way because they know it’s ridiculous. Some “professional” J.O.B.s (inherently) require slacks and to that I would say, please don’t make ME uncomfortable interacting with you by being overdressed when it’s hotter than hell–there’s nothing wrong with a good quality shirt and an open collar, provided it looks put together and not sloppy, if you MUST wear pants (forget the damn tie). I wish we would just have signs at all the major interstate off ramps with a picture of a guy and gal in pants with a red circle around them as well as line through the pic. DONE.

  2. If you have arms and legs like the photo, you should only be allowed to wear shorts.

    The religious folks that knock on my door might want to consider this too. If you think you are making your religion look enticing, standing in 110 degree heat in a suit or a dress, you are mistaken.


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