Stop it with the long Facebook goodbyes

You’ve seen it. Someone wants to leave Facebook and they can’t JUST LEAVE. For Godsakes, there’s people out there that need to hear your diatribe on the state of Facebook and how it’s “just not what it used to be” or how much “politics have no place here”. You’ve also got to be sure that it’s no less than 3 paragraphs long because otherwise, no one will believe that you’re really leaving…#fakenews.

When you do this, btw… this is probably how you feel:

But if I’m being honest… this is what it feels like to read your “It’s so hard to say goodbye” goodbye:

Let me help you craft a much better goodbye… are you ready?

“Hi Facebook Friends! I’m deactivating my account. If you need to reach me, my email is *insert email here*. K. Thx. Bye!”

That’s it! And then you’re off to living your life and the 3 people who saw it (due to Facebook’s lovely algorithm) will thank you for your brevity and talk to you sometime soon elsewhere on the internet (or maybe they won’t – their choice).

You’re welcome.